So I want you to know that I am putting this out there to help and inspire everyone to have more dating success, to point fingers. ” and pretty much any sentence that begins with ‘why didn’t you,’ it’s like nails on a chalkboard.I can tell you from a guy’s perspective that when a woman says things like: “Why didn’t you call? Those kinds of statements will immediately put a guy on the defensive rather than motivating him to change and he’ll probably withdraw emotionally as a result… I would say the core reason of this is that it attacks a guy’s sense of freedom and feeling of acknowledgment. Well, when a woman starts down this chain of “Why didn’t you…” it feels to a guy as if she isn’t noticing all of the other things he is doing for a relationship. It’s perfectly normal and healthy to want a relationship with all the good qualities: connection, chemistry, understanding, intimacy, attentiveness and on and on.Now while you might start getting really excited by this prospect, this particular guy has probably gotten freaked out.At this point, he’s afraid that everything he said in the beginning has led you to believe that you guys are a couple and he starts acting in a way that shows you this is not the case.
But neediness is not gender-specific – guys make the mistake of being “needy” too!If you start getting on his case (“Why didn’t you call? ”, etc.) he will feel trapped and suffocated and start pulling away.I have seen My boyfriend and I have been in a relationship for 4 years this July. He sort-of, but not really asked me to marry him last year.If you’ve been dating a lot of players recently, this new, emotionally available behavior may seem startling. When a guy genuinely likes you, he wants to spend time with you, regardless of what you do together.So if your cutie invites you to hang out and watch movies at his place, get coffee after work, or meet at the Laundromat on Sunday night so you can keep each other company while washing your clothes, chances are good that he’s into you.